Join me for an unfiltered #realtalk conversation about what it means to be successful in life and business.
I'm Jessi. Your kick-ass photographer, designer and mega hype girl.
I'm here to help you grow your brand and bring your big dreams TO LIFE!
Spoiler alert: Success is determined by NO ONE but you.
🛑 STOP waiting for the perfect time to chase that dream of yours.
🚦 GO take that first step, no matter how tiny or messy it is.
👏🏽I PROMISE future you will be proud and thankful.
Jessi Cabanin 00:04
Hey, girl, Hey, are you ready for some real talk? If you are a female entrepreneur who has ever felt like a total failure, or maybe even a frequent flyer of imposter syndrome, this podcast is for you. I'm your host, Jessi, a millennial business owner, boy mom and creative genius helping women bring their business dreams to life. After 10 years of building numerous creative brands from the ground up, I'm ready to get real about what actually goes on behind the scenes of building your very own empire failure opened up brand new mindset for me. And I really want that for you too, because honestly, I am just so over society's definition of what it means to live a successful life. So together, we are going to create and navigate a version of success that works for you. Together, we can redefine fabulous.
Jessi Cabanin 00:52
Okay, so I want to start today, by first, obviously, happy Friday. Okay, but I want to start today. And I want to know, if you have something that you really want right now, like you really want it, maybe it's a thing, and maybe it's a business, maybe it's a person, whatever it is, do you have a thing that you really want? But you're stuck? Like, do you feel stuck? Okay, we all feel stuck at certain points. But like, is there something right now that you really want? That you feel stuck? All the excuses not to push forward with it? Right? Do you have all the negative self talk about why you shouldn't do it? Are you waiting for everything to be perfect? Before you start? Okay, I want you to really think about that. And I want to know, raise your hand, I want to know if you are feeling that way, if that's something that you're going through right now.
Jessi Cabanin 01:51
So full transparency, I have multiple, I have a lot I have. But you know, I've mentioned in a lot of other episodes that I'm you know, I want to talk about a little more today, but I've mentioned it before, that I really enjoy reading more about people's journey, or even hearing about it, reading it, hearing about it, whatever, I enjoy hearing more about their journey, and their struggle, then I do the destination of success. Okay, so like many times the destination which if you know me well enough, you know, that I am not a fan of destinations at all like destination is I feel like what makes us have really limited beliefs of what we can do. And we start, we start to focus more on that destination, then we focus on the journey and the things that we can learn along the way.
Jessi Cabanin 02:40
So I enjoy hearing more about the struggle and the raw. Okay, and I hope you do too, because I really want to morph the purpose of this podcast, to be more of a journey that we go through together, don't get me wrong, I'm still going to be talking about business, I'm still going to be talking about marketing, I'm still going to be talking about mom life and how horrendous It is sometimes, okay, but I want to do it a little bit more in real time. Because I want to connect with you on a different level. Okay, so I want you to understand that I don't have it all figured out. I don't want to portray myself as someone who has it all figured out. That's that's not who I am. And, and for those of you who may be clients of mine, you know that because I am very open about that. But I do want to make sure that I don't spend too much time trying to produce this like perfect podcast, because the reality of the situation is that life isn't perfect business isn't perfect. So why should I spend so much extra time trying to make sure that this podcast is perfect. So I hope that you guys kind of understand where I'm coming from with that. And I hope that you guys will come along on this journey with me as well. And I hope that you guys will also share your journeys because I feel like there is power in numbers. And I just, I just want to do this together with you.
Jessi Cabanin 04:00
So in full honesty, I've definitely been struggling recently. I mean, I've been struggling with a lot of different things. But I was really stuck on like, what's been hindering me with growing this podcast a little bit more. Okay, the podcast has been on my heart for a long time. And I finally took that step to start okay. And I was really proud of that stuff. And I really have been trying to be consistent, but consistency is hard and sometimes sometimes you think you're doing the right things and then you realize that you're not doing the right things. Okay, so like, I finally noticed that I was in this constant state of like, waiting, waiting for the perfect topic waiting for the perfect guest to agree to come on here with me waiting for the perfect time to record, you know, waiting until my kid is gone, waiting until he's at school waiting until he's leap, whatever it is, I was waiting, I just keep waiting.
Jessi Cabanin 05:04
Jessi Cabanin 05:13
Okay, so this morning, I got up and I decided that I was going to go for a walk. Because you know, I've also been struggling with my physical health, my mental health, I've been struggling a lot with that lately, I have a lot of injuries. And I kind of found myself, don't get me wrong, there are plenty of things that are limiting my body right now based on my injuries. But I've also been kind of like, realizing that my thoughts were going towards, you know, once I have this many therapy sessions, then I can work out again, or once I feel a certain way, then I can work out again. And the reality of the situation was that I needed to be moving my body, I needed to be doing more than I was doing. And it's it's a very hard thing to put into words. And I'm sure that you guys can relate to that. But it was just something that I was finally like, I'm just gonna go out for a walk, I'm gonna try to clear my head, I'm going to try to really dive into work today. And if I don't do it now, I'm not going to do it. Okay, so I got out of the house. It's not super hot today in Chicago, it was it was a it was great walk. And then when I got back, I decided, You know what, I'm going to use those kettlebells I got for Christmas, I'm going to do a very basic moves. Because I know that there are a lot of things that my body cannot do right now I know that there are specific things that will put me in a place where I like literally can't walk for like two days, it's awful.
Jessi Cabanin 06:41
And I want to be a little bit more open about that journey, because it's been something that it's been really scary. It's been something that's been going on for a couple of years now. And I will never forget the first time it happened a powerhouse. And I literally like collapsed to the floor between stations and could not walk I could not lift my body up. I could not lift my trunk up I could I literally crawl down the stairs. Like if you were a powerhouse that day two years ago, or whatever it was. You remember, like I remember people being like, Can I help you? And I was like, I don't even know what's happening. I need to go. Go. It's just been a really scary couple of years. I'm trying to figure out kind of what's going on with that. But I do realize that doing nothing is worse.
Jessi Cabanin 07:25
So that's not the point of the story today. But obviously, for those of you guys watching live Yes, I look disgusting, because, you know, I got the ugliest workout in this morning. And it was super imperfect. But I did it. And I as I was doing it, you know, I just I really got to thinking you know, I'm really clear thoughts while I was doing that. And I knew that if I jotted the notes down and put them for later for the perfect time to record. I would either never go back and do it. Or when I did the clarity would be completely gone. Okay, so as you guys know, I love to release episodes on Fridays, right? #FabulousFridaysWithJessi. Okay, I love to I love to release them stupid early in the morning because I have this like mentality this thought that I hope that you catch it. You know when you're getting ready in the morning or when you're on your way to work and just feel kind of like a light under your butt for the weekend.
Jessi Cabanin 08:21
Okay, and alas this week was another one of those weeks where I was waiting for the perfect time to record. I was waiting for the perfect topic. Okay, so I decided Screw it. Screw it. I'm not going to wait how am I going to shower um, I'm going to clean my office. I'm not going to like make sure I have this like really pretty background behind me. Okay, I'm going to get myself some coffee. Cheers. Okay, and I am going to sit at the mic and I'm going to just do it.
Jessi Cabanin 08:55
Okay, now don't get me wrong. That is not an easy mindset. Like just doing it is not an easy mindset and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't but when it does, there's a strength to it. There's there's really like an like a personal empowering strength to that okay, so I said screw it, whatever I don't give a shit. Okay, I'm going to show up raw. Okay, and you know on social media makes it makes life look so much different. Okay, it makes so much different than it really is. And I am 1,000% Guilty of also tried to make sure that my social media oh and say totally glamorous, but like making sure that my social media is better than what life looks like. Okay, but today I decided screw all of that. Okay, I'm going to show up raw. I have no makeup on. I'm literally sweating as I'm sitting here. I'm still in a disgusting sweaty shirt. Okay, and I will whole heartedly appreciate when people show up raw as fuck. Okay, so hopefully you do too because that is where we're at today. Okay, so that I also decided, You know what, since I missed my upload this week, okay? And don't get me wrong, I beat myself up about that. Okay, I beat myself up mentally when I miss my episodes because I really, really want to be consistent. And when I took a course with Kacia, you know, they talk about consistency and data, and she talks about how amazing she was about podcasting, two days a week for the last two years. Like she never misses an episode. And it's just kind of another one of those examples of like, impostor syndrome being like, well, she did it. That's how I have to do it, too. Okay.
Jessi Cabanin 10:32
And so I had to stop myself. Sometimes I have to stop myself from beating myself up for missing a deadline or missing something that I wanted to do, because we're all human, and things come up, and life happens, right? So I decided that since I miss my broadcast, or since I missed my, so I decided since I missed my upload this week, okay. I'm going to broadcast this life.
Jessi Cabanin 10:56
Maybe I will reach someone today who needs to hear this. Maybe I will reach someone before they're actually listening to the podcast. Maybe they need to hear something like this today. Maybe you are someone that needs to hear this today. Okay. And you know what, maybe no one will watch this. Maybe no one will ever listen to this on Instagram, but also who the free cares. Who cares?
Jessi Cabanin 11:22
Okay. So yes, this podcast came about in hopes of helping other people but I also a podcast for my own growth. I also podcast for my own resources for my own story. Okay, so if you're like me, which I know you are, you probably have plenty of things holding you back right now. Okay. It might be fitness goals, weight loss goals, business goals. Maybe you're trying to start a family. Maybe you're trying to start a podcast. Okay.
Jessi Cabanin 11:51
Jessi Cabanin 12:18
Okay, just think about that today. Okay,
Jessi Cabanin 12:30
Now, I understand that everybody's circumstances are different. Okay? Literally all of us live in our own world. No two of us are alike. Even if you're twins, no two of us are 100%. alike. Okay, so while I will not tell you go quit your job today. Go follow that dream. I don't know your circumstances. I don't know, if you have a family that you need to take care of financially. I don't know, if you have a house you need to pay for or car. I don't know your financial situation. But I do know that no matter your circumstance, you can start. Okay. I'm not saying that you have to leave your job today. Well, if you're in a place where you can have had a girl and you know, put 100% of your life into this dream into this business and to this goal, whatever you're chasing right now, okay.
Jessi Cabanin 13:18
Jessi Cabanin 13:26
You don't have to feel like you can get to the destination today or tomorrow, next week, next year. But you will never ever go in that direction unless you start. Okay, you have to take a step, you have to decide that you want to change something in order to change something. Okay?
I know that's really hard to absorb because even I have a really hard time absorbing that sometimes and change is obviously really scary. But if you have if you are one of my coaching clients or if you have ever talked to me about your dreams and your business and your goals,
Fear is the gas in your car, okay? Fear means that you have passion for it, that it's something that matters to you. Okay?
Jessi Cabanin 14:21
So when you start to feel fear about something harness that harness that fear, don't let it debilitate you, okay, if you find it overwhelming and it becomes debilitating, walk away and come back to it with a fresh mind. But fear is your friend. Fear is your friend. I promise you that fear will take you places fear will force you into growth. Okay, so if something isn't feeling right right now or something is on your heart that you want to grow. Take a step. Take one freaking step maybe that step is getting up early. Earlier in the morning and Do you know taking an hour to yourself before your kids makeup? Spoiler alert, that's what I'm trying to do right now. Okay, I'm trying to like, embrace a little bit more time to myself to just kind of build and kind of think about what I want to grow into. Right? So, I want you to think about what you can do this week, to give yourself a little bit more time, give yourself a little bit of grace, to start chasing that goal, chasing that dream, okay, because you don't have to wait for the perfect time to start.
Where's the journey? Where's the growth? Like, what the hell look like, that's boring to me. I don't know if like, everybody wants to succeed, everybody wants to make money. Everybody wants to make it to a destination. Okay? But the fun of that the growth of that is in the journey. Why are we spending so much time worrying about the destination, and so much less time thinking about the journey and really being present in the journey and really absorbing everything that the journey has to offer us? Okay. So, the journey is where the magic happens. The journey is how we find success and how we define success for ourselves.
Okay, so instead of wondering about the domino effect of failing, like, what if, okay, what if you started thinking about the domino effect of growth and opportunity if it works out?
Jessi Cabanin 16:44
Jessi Cabanin 16:55
All right Babe, I hope you really enjoyed today's conversation. I'm super curious to know what your biggest takeaway was from today. So go ahead and share this episode on social media. Make sure you tag me at @thiswaytofabulous and let me know what you connected with. What did you learn from the episode and what action item are you going to take today?
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